Introduction
Another book? Yep, you heard right—another book. But let’s clear this up straight away: my first book, You Are the Beef, wasn’t a self-help book. Not in the traditional sense, anyway. It was more like a scrapbook of life’s adventures and lessons. This one? It’s a bit different. It’s about people—how I see them, what makes them tick, and why they sometimes drive me up the wall. But hey, who am I to offer an opinion? Exactly. The clue’s in the title.
Taxi driving—it’s been an eye-opener, to say the least. Sure, there’s stress and the constant dance of being broke, but it’s also a front-row seat to humanity. Broke? Well, money is going to feature a lot in this book. Do we really need loads of money? The answer is probably no. Go ask the Uma Guma tribe in Africa. Happiness and total awareness is a much better gig and definitely the way forward. So are you totally content? (you may be asking) And the answer is a bit fat, no, but it’s the journey that counts life would be boring without some struggles.
Listen, I wouldn’t claim to be the greatest driver (I’ve got Google Maps for that), and I’m always mugging it off early, no wonder I’m broke. However, when it comes to handling people and customers, I know I’m one of the best. Don’t just take my word for it; I’ve had enough customers tell me so. Of course, it’s not all roses. I’m fairly certain I’ve been called a cunt more times than I care to count, but that’s just part of the job, isn’t it?
Sitting behind the wheel has turned me into an unlicensed agony aunt. People hop in, spill their troubles, and hop out. Whether I’m a good listener or just a convenient one is debatable—especially when my ADHD kicks in and I can’t stop talking long enough for them to finish a sentence. Still, it’s funny how so few actually take my advice. I dish out pearls of wisdom, and they treat them like pearls before swine. Maybe it’s for the best. I’m not big on criticism myself, so I suppose I should just zip it for now.
Over the years, I’ve dipped into self-help books to make sense of the madness. Whether they’ve helped or not is anyone’s guess, but I dread to think how I’d view the world without them.
Sometimes I can read a chapter and can’t tell you or remember a single thing. But someone could say something and I see to remember something about it in the book. So it’s getting in there somewhere.
This book, though? This one’s not about fixing anyone. It’s about sharing the chaos, the quirks, and the comedy of life as I see it. And maybe, just maybe, it’ll help you see the world differently—or at least give you a laugh at my expense. Either way, enjoy the ride.